Saturday, January 10, 2009

The 10 rules of Parklife (2008)

First rule of Parklife:
You have to queue to get in the queue that leads to the queue to get in.

Second rule of Parklife: I'm so underground I only emerge to complain about music festivals.

Third rule of Parklife: If you're Morgan Geist of Metro Area, look sullen and moody but play happy disco music.

Rule 3(a) of Parklife: Morgan Geist is "the whitest boy alive".

Fourth rule of Parklife: Bump into good friends who offer you bumps.

Fifth rule of Parklife: Tabasco sauce is easy to smuggle past security and enhances the tequila experience.

Sixth rule of Parklife: Look away quickly when you see young men masturbating in public.

Seventh rule of Parklife: Diplo sounds shit even when you are at a big festival, drunk and sitting in the VIP area.

Rule 7(a) or Parklife: Diplo even sounds shit from behind the speaker stack.

Eighth rule of Parklife: It would be much better if there were just 10 of us and we had a Private Parklife.

Ninth rule of Parklife: Goldfrapp are great but too slow to put on that late.

Tenth rule of Parklife: You actually have to queue to get OUT.


  1. haha, nice. I especially like the Tabasco smugle and I was looking forward to actually seeing Diplo next time he comes down he is just a lot of hype?

  2. Not my cup of tea. Big beats without much subtlety. Crowd-pleasing in that dumb-ass kinda way. Kids loved him, but the kids were well munted that day... the most loved up crowd I've seen in ages.